Gomen, Ran
by Yaraslava Rada
Summary: A short oneshot. Ran sees Conan when his shield is down. Songfic. I dont own Case Closed. Song by L'arcenciel.


I wake up from a nightmare now

In the day it haunts me

It slowly tears me apart

With dreams of a distant love

I'm a wandering satellite

Conan sits up on his futon drenched in a cold sweat. "Again." He mumbles crossing the floor over to the small window. "I had that dream-no nightmare," He clarifies. "Again." He whispers opening the window letting a saddened expression take over his facial features. His eyes dull and his happy aura is gone.

Somewhere in the wasteland

I see you smiling at me

A vision out of my dreams

Will everything change?

Take the pain away

Lead me with your light

Ran cringes from the doorway. "What is it that fills you with such dreadful nights?" She whispers to the boy but her words fall upon deaf ears. The 'boy' has given up his hope of light for the time being. "What is it that brings such a mature expression to your face? What fills your eyes with knowledge and experience? You are a man trapped in a boy's body. What is it that I can do to help you?" Ran whispers to the deaf boy.

Heading for the sun

Leave the sadness behind

Crossing oceans dry

Yeah

Conan sighs plopping down upon his windowsill. He glares out over the town silently cursing the one's responsible for his condition. His ears perk up at the sound of a voice. Not any voice, Ran's voice. He sighs listening to the sound of it dancing through the air. That melodious voice. The voice of his long-time and at this point never-to-be crush. "Ran." He says to the girl outside his door. "Why do you care so much? Shinichi may never come back. Why do you smile every day? How can you live knowing he's so close yet so far away?" He asks never turning from his gaze over the sky.

My world spinning out of time

Won't somebody stop me?

I may be losing my way

Will you make it right?

Take the pain away

Hear me as I cry

Ran gasps as she hears Conan's words. She steps into the room knowing that hiding behind a door will do no good. "I wait because I love him. I care because I love you. I smile because of you. You are my happiness. Without you I would have fallen into depression. He will return. I know he will. He has to. I live because I know he will return. Even if I'm not around to see it happen. He will come back to me." She says failing to notice his tears. Or just choosing not to.

Heading for the sun

Leave the sadness behind

Crossing oceans dry

Deep inside I go

Conan sits stiffly trying to force back the tears that threaten to take over his face. He raises a single hand and rubs away the tears forming. "He is already here." Conan says putting one hand over his watch and lifting up the cover. "Gomen, Ran." He says turning to face her. He looks at her trying to convey his feelings through his eyes. She sees and her eyes widen. At that moment he pushes the red button on the side of his watch and watches as ran slumps down to the floor.

What can I do, I ask?

There's nothing left to say

What can I do, I ask?

There's nothing left to say

Why am I here?

Why am I lost?

Where is love?

Lead me with your light

Conan then lets the tears flow from his eyes. "There. I told you? Are you happy Ran?" He asks a harsh tone to his voice. "I love you and I can't help it. I love you and I can't change it. I love you but it's not to be. From what I can see I am meant to grow up as Edogawa Conan. I AM NOT CONAN! I DON'T WANT TO BE CONAN! I HATE CONAN!" He yells at the girl lying on his floor. After a moment of silence he turns from the girl and goes back to looking out the window. Then after a while of reflecting he goes over to the girl and picks her up taking her to her room. "Gomen, Ran." He whispers before going back to his own closes his window whispering a last few words to their conversation. Letting his unheard vow be carried away on the winds of fate.

Heading for the sun

Leave the sadness behind

Crossing oceans dry

Deep inside I go

Heading for the sun

Leave the sadness behind

Crossing oceans dry

Deep inside I go

"Only when I am Shinichi will I be able to leave the sadness. Only as Shinichi will I be able to make you as happy as you make me. Only as Shinichi will we be able to be completely happy."


End file.
